Gears of Peace

amazing night

Me and Joy are over. What was once a couple is now a friendship. Despite the obvious difficulties, things seem to be better now. No more needless fighting and one-upping. regardless, Last night I was with Judith and it was fantastic. We went from bang-bang to Cubana, making out all the way. That women just has a fire inside her that makes it difficult to not feel impassioned by her when she is around you. Its something else. Joy is my best friend on this planet. This is hurting her due to the obvious similarities between her and Judi. I mean, I enjoy the company of dark-skinned women. Of course I am going to date a coloured lady again! these feelings of jelousy and anger will hopefully be replaced by acceptance and love. As I love her very much and would hate to see her hurt like this. Poor Joy. So many hang-ups and phobias and mind-fuckeries. Mwah to you my angel. I pray you will be happier in the days to come.

i hate my life.

fucked

My phone is fucked. I attempted the software update and now it will not turn on. PLUS! My xbox red light of death'ed me! Shit! but I fixed it. plus.... the internet went down and I had to rectify its errors. Phew. Stress sorted. Finally. I came back from Cubana with a hot chick on my arm. Joy natch. We both downed a HUNTERS, fooled around and came back home. Now she plays Bejeweled 2 on the 360 and I'm blogging and preparing supper. But honestly, since the home DSL, I have not used my phone once. I will miss it as I send it in to Virgin for repairs, but I will not mourn it. Not at all.

high

Crikey im high.

Busy

Half way with my reviews. I only just started 5 mins ago.... :P

Lucky fucking me.

I must just note that as I blog this from our shiny and super fast laptop, which is connected to our 384k DSL, which in turn powers the Xbox live in my modded for copies Xbox360, which has our 30gig ipop plugged in, which streams Cafe Del Mar from its Media centre interface, I think about what a lucky smug fucker I am. Hot girlfriend, super cool flat and all the things I need from life. Thumnbs up. Gotta get my hot, toasted whole-wheat bread sandwhiches.

Marmite

This video is stupid humor. Is this what Marmite has come to? Fuck off then Marmite. Christ. Its a bit classier in South Africa at least.

wine

too... Much... Wine...

Sleep

Why am I so tired...? going to bed. Too much wine. When is Joy's period over I am so ajjjj.

Vlog

My VBlog should be supreme. i CANT wait to show everyone.

More testing

Ha what a larf. such a sweet test of note!

last night

Damn I dont know what to say. Christians sure are a laff though. They seem to want to be all chummy with the bearded one. Good luck to them. I don't want to remember. I'm sorry Rabbi. >;) Cleanse me.

Cold day

almost time for work. Juuuust checking my Gmail. Its all crap. Except for a job spec from Joy. Woah. Time to shower. 13deg today and storming. Fuck.

Today

The day has rolled on with no intense vibes. Supper is almost ready and my love plays Xbox live games on the couch. Could life be any more friendly? I think not. Plus I have completed 10 reviews today so I feel as if I have really accomplished something! :-)

The longest eyelash ever.

Behold. On the left is a normal eyelash and on the right is my long fucked up mutant eyelash. Be wary of such sudden mutations professor X would say.

complete

10 reviews. Finished. Thank the shiny host of No'ggoth. time to withdraw into the plains of Cyroddil.

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Yet another day

The sun strikes me warmly on my stomach. I sit her in a semi-naked state, finishing my reviews for the weekend. Distraction is a nutty beast of note. It takes the merest pin-pricks of auditory or sensory stimuli to distract me from the task at hand. Fuck this. Back to work.

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Only fear the cord itself.

Another day rolls one. Or by. My clock indicates that it is 12:08pm. 52 minutes until I consume chips drenched in the sauce of cheese and chilli. Last night was very pleasant actually. Joytjie and V went watch Being Jane at Cavendish Square so I was left to my own devices. So in order of excitement, my evening was as follow: Got high, played Oblivion, hot high, Ate, played Oblivion, tried to watch the shit movie on Etv, played Oblivion, greeted Joyful, played Oblivion and went to bed. Hot or Not? I wish to speak about Oblivion though... In a later post today.

J for Joytjie :) and V for Verash

I much prefer having female friends to male friends. Verashni, my latest chum is an inspiration to all. Despite the multiple spell of bad luck that have befallen her, she has managed to keep her chin up though the times and push on through to the good.

My dutiful girlfriend has also become a happier and more enlightened person now that I am smoking less of the Jamacian Herb. Men, do stupid and silly things to irrate the women they love. My only hope is that she will one day... learn to roll as well as I do and share a relaxing J with me. I love you so much Joy. Here is a kiss for you. Muuuuwah.

Amazement

It is simply amazing how different my life was four months ago. I was a hopeless loser smoking gaanj all the time with little to no ambition. Now, I reside in Green point with my sexy, wonderful, super-cool wierd girlfriend Joy. I have an Xbox360, DSL and not one but TWO jobs. Do you like apples? Well hows them apples? Huh? HUH?

Steve out.

JOB!!!!!

Fuck kids! I have a job! Content assistant for www.pricecheck.co.za! Oh yes check it out!

DVD Verdict: DVD Reviews, with Flair

DVD Verdict: DVD Reviews, with Flair

Perhaps the greatest DVD review site in the world. Shit I have not blogged for a while.

Prison

The final episode of the current season of Prison Break was a let down, to be sure. Some bullshit about some Mexican prison bullshit. If this is creative and exciting television then fuck me if i'm not going to watch anymore. If Hero's turns out this way, I will renounce TV altogether. I'm really enjoying this laptop. My current PC is on the blink and this is a way, way, way, way better one. Back hurts. No weed to fix my ills either. Shit.

Munny

Advertising for my site is all around me. Please click on a link or two so I can become richer. 10 dollah richer by my account. My girlfriend Joy came back last night. She has been away in Joburg for a long time. I missed her so much.

Red Devils

Now that I know its here (DSL), It venom bubbles to the surface on a regular basis. And I need DSL. If I can only get free DSL... That would be cool as shit. A long week of possible depression stretches out in front of me now. As I lie here on Rael's couch with a smooth one in my hand I wonder, why am I blogging such shit. Action time. I need a bath cause I feel rat-dirty. Cosy.... Yet Rat Durty (sic)

PA

I'm passive aggressive. The doctor told me so. I would say more but i'm watching some porn. Later.

High and Mighty

Feeling high as a kite here folks. My mother hovers around me looking for excuses to talk about her fat Israeli bastard boyfriend David. Or not really. I just don't like the fuck. Some people you just don't like. Ever. Like Hitler or that guy on the Vodacom commercials, the fucking bushcat. Whatever happended to Yebo Gogo? It was phased out almost overnight. Well good. The more cuck phased out the better.

My job interview yesterday could not have gone better if it had gone even better. We will wait and see if I get this illustrious position. Ill update later. Going to see a man about a job. Assessment. He is a job assessment psychiatrist.

Remember and I haven't said this enough, respect the Dunny. For it is love.


(lovely Dunny pictured above. this is a super rare 8 inch Tado luv Dunny. one of the rarest in the world. for more on these lovable beings, point your browser to www.kidrobot.com I must also point out that I'm not paid by Kidrobot to promote Dunny's I just fucking love them)

Cassie Voice

When my friend, either Brett or Rael talks to their hound Cassie (not pictured) they talk to her like one would speak to a small child. That is the Cassie voice or the dog voice. With cats you have to go "pshhh pshhh" just so that they can cast their discourteous looks upon you. Dogs love you, end of story. Cats hate you from the start and then begin to love you, after you feed them. Once upon a time I had two little cats. Blommetjie (small flower in Afrikaans) and SpongeBob. Gone now. They were mucho problemo but I loved them so. Cute little noses and tiny little kitty paws. My girlfriend, during her bad luck patch managed to neglect them to the point they had to go to another home. Sure, I could have taken them to my home, but that would have run the risk of my mother drowning them in a burlap sack. Enough sadness.

Tamagotchis

Did you ever notice how if you put two girlfdriends together they start to interact like Tamagotchies? All the bleebing and shit. Its crazy.

The Beard of Shame

Here is Stage 1 of the beard. Is it lovely?


FULL SIZE BEAUTY AND SEXY TEETH BABY!
And the beard is mighty as a rock.

I play it Cold

Morning. Some of you may have trouble enjoying my favourite 'obby. Which is having a sneaky "J". Here is a pictorial instruction blog for the less skilled tokers out there to enjoy.

Step 1: Maul it.

Step 2: Roll it.

Step 3: Smoke it.

Wasn't that easy? Happy toking. And happy something day. Its another holiday that the government pulled out of their asshole. Not that I'm complaining. I'm unemployed!

This

Is how you waste time.

Sand in your vagina

My girlfriend made an unannounced visit. And Lo and behold my mother was acting normal as well. The day has been boring. Alan came over. We had a drink and a Smoke and a laff. I played some Need for Speed: Carbon. Chatted some on Mxit. Now I'm eating a Bar-one.

The Logo

The Logo is sexy. prove me wrong.

Rainy Spleef

Just toked me a marvellous rainy day Spleef. Fuck its hard to Mxit (SA only chat app for our phones) when I'm blogging like a mad pig. Just put the "Röyksopp - Melody A.M" music on. Its beats drive my mind into a wild smoothness. Most of these blogs have a fancy logo. Mine will be up soon. Must, just figure it out. But I will. Peasy when you are PC keen. Evidently in May it will be 5 months since I gave up smoking fucking cigs. I did not enjoy it as much as I did smoking weed you see? Far more enjoyable to get some sort of a, side effect... Something trippy like that. The logo..........?

AIDS. Lol :)

My friend and Life-long Frisbee partner (that sounds gay). My fellow droog went for an AIDS test today. Well, he got his results about 20 mins ago. Clean as a newborn, his words. That bodes well. AIDS is a shitty disease and it takes weeks of showering and eating African potatoes to cure (citation needed). That, is a joke. If you get the AIDS you might as well ride the silver shotgun express and paint the walls with your disease. Always use condoms boys. And if you are bare backing a strange lady, just screw safely. Unless you have a cut on your willy, which mixes with her saliva and Jesus-H , then there is no escaping it.

S.T.A.L.K.E.R, shadow of Chernobyl is the latest game to be polished off by me. I would say that takes my running total to 1000 games finished plus/minus. More then 20 years I've been playing games. If you think 1000 is impossible to reach then you are a child of the 90's and not the 80's. Back in the 80's a game could be finished in 10 mins (or R5 rand in coins for the arcade machine) enabling you to level a playing field of machines at N1 City. Writing this blog is so cathartic. Like taking a meaty shit onto the fucking internet itself. In a couple of mins my mummy dearest is going to her Jewish Studies course and then I'm going to roll a smooth and skinny joint. Its white layer barely containing the THC pollen wrapped inside itself.

Fuck there she goes. J time.

Fuck it

Being a passive-aggressive person is a real challenge. It ranks right up there with self-mutilation and castration in terms of simplicity and lifestyle choices. If you want to know what it is about... then try to imagine being constantly angry for no reason at all. Even when you are happy you are mad depro. When you are sad you constantly think about suicide but being passive-aggressive you are too scared to really go through with it. I feel psychotic almost. I have all the semblance of a normal life, a girlfriend, good friends, a R60 a week drug habit and a smashing PC for its age. But it's not enough. I lost my job 4 months ago thanks to a CUNT of a boss. He was an aggressive fucker from Durban. Bertie Schamrel. Bertie cock sucking, dick licking man-ass pounding Schamrel. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck you, you mad cunt. I had a very cushy job with him but it was pure fear and loathing in Cape Town it was. Compliant after complaint. Pure aggression which folded me into a paper crane of sympathy and passive allure. It was highly unpleasant. Alan is coming over now; we are going to watch SP (south park) and veg out.

This is the pic that would not upload. I do all my posts from word. Jesus titty twisting christ I hate complications.

A Little info

Name: Steve, a man of 27 with no regard for sanity.

Location: Plumstead, inside Cape Town.

Photo: I'm in the middle. These two are my friends.

Food: Anything crispy or cheesy. Or both.

Smoke: Only the ganj my droogs. Cigs murder you like disco.

Work: Retired (unemployed really)

Girlfriend: Yes

Other girlfriends: No

Status: Currently Drunk

Other info: I can be hired as a very good manwhore. Terms and conditions apply*

 

*no gays.

Lol

Jesus, this is strong beer. Drinking 2 in the afternoon is fun.

One Note Song

The cheese festival is on Saturday. There will not be weed though. Getting high on wine is not the same. But I'm going to try. I'm going to try. Later on is my mommy's birthday party at the Sugarloaf cafe. Having a smooth and quiet draft, as my friend Alan would say.

Test

This is how you test a blog motherfuckers.